tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-86881391606895517802024-02-06T19:56:53.870-07:00Sattvic LifeMy expansion as a person and growth as a human by the materials of yoga, art, and music.Merilovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06407393547792365687noreply@blogger.comBlogger61125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8688139160689551780.post-81456516876848473792012-05-01T16:57:00.002-06:002012-05-01T17:01:15.205-06:00Human Organics"<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ippIzUSjMAQ" target="_blank"><b>I was born botanical</b></a>.The soul of an animal deep beneath the layers, I sink my roots no need for mechanical.<br />
I come strictly organical. When I need to feast, I look to the East, that's why I'm never scared of the beast. Even though they try to prey upon me, I'm protected by the one always greater than me. So now I reveal to thee because you wanna see the contour of my mystery, the strength of my arches, the colour of my conscience and the way that I process my diction, some fact, some diction, some mystery, some future fantasy. I'm the trunk that holds the branches, the leaves who do the dances, my flowers romantic my love gigantic. From Africa, transplanted translantic in the heat of the sun, I bring shade for everyone, like the beat on the one.<br />
<a href="http://distilleryimage2.instagram.com/5053c7d293e111e180d51231380fcd7e_7.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://distilleryimage2.instagram.com/5053c7d293e111e180d51231380fcd7e_7.jpg" width="400" /></a>I'm the skin on the drum.<br />
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I keep on living with the fullness of the one<br />
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j7-DeHQ0il4" target="_blank">like the heat of the sun or the skin on the drum</a><br />
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I'm fully marinated and now I'm ready for the fire"<br />
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Michael Franti<br />
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Ever thought of a world without self doubt? Ever thought of how we could potentially just trust that it will all work out in the end? What if we could know that no matter <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CuLbGritTcs" target="_blank">what the situation</a>, we will always be happy. We will always choose goodness and love over anything else. Trusting the deepest part of your core will connect with all other circumstances in the world and bring it all to it's destination. Knowing that the life in you will show you and others so much exaggerated greatness. That light will bloom from every action whenever it sits aligned with your personal truth.<br />
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I challenge you to do something that is out of your normal behavior. Do something<a href="http://www.blogger.com/goog_1485830310"></a> <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T8PHNeT_x1U&feature=related" target="_blank">you've been putting off </a>or maybe even never thought was an option for whatever reason. Don't even think of an excuse, just put your hand right in and muddle with it. <br />
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Our lives are only here for a limited time. If we don't fill them as full as possible, there's no point in putting in the energy for a permanently empty shell. <br />
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Create. Move. Love. <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jgkd2lFI9X8&feature=related" target="_blank">Let go of your pride</a> and see where it takes you. <br />
We're all just specs. Don't let the idea of life get the upper hand. Fuck with it while you have the chance. <br />
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<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zKx45wKC3FY" target="_blank">Constantly learning,</a><br />
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M.Merilovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06407393547792365687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8688139160689551780.post-79185725002101407302012-04-16T15:38:00.000-06:002012-04-16T15:38:49.169-06:00The Choice is Yours<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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"What if today was your day? <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r4p8qxGbpOk" target="_blank">The most amazing day of your life</a>, so far? A day that would change everything for the better. Whats already good would become great. Whats already great would become amazing. And what's already amazing would become the stuff of legends. <br />And all you had to do to take advantage of the good and wonderful things about to happen to you, was treat folks with a true and eager kindness, think mostly of those things that <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bb_ZQn943z4" target="_blank">please you</a>, and go out into the world, just a bit, where you could meet, mingle, and fall in love? <br /><br />Today is your day, yet if by its end nothing seems to have happened, it may just mean that tomorrow, for sure, will be the most amazing day of your life."<br /><br /><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5aqKA_2UUy4" target="_blank">It is Spring, folks</a>. Time for regrowth, motivation, rays of sunshine and budding opportunities. With the return of the sun and a little bit of heat melting the soil of these Flat Lands, I think of how easy it is to get sucked into a rhythm of negativity. Sometimes a forceful push is helpful. "An object at rest tends to stay at rest, an object in motion tends to stay in motion." <br />I feel as if we just take advantage of the boosts that we need to push forwards in life, more opportunities will come to us! It can be challenging to learn from those dips in life rather than let them scar you and hold you down. It is something that takes a strong mind. <br /><br />The quote at the top is from a <a href="http://www.tut.com/resources/notes/" target="_blank">website </a>that sends an email every morning encouraging you to be persistant in persuing the goals in your life. I feel like taking time out of our <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fpns_a4Nuvo&feature=related" target="_blank">mental habits</a> to develop a clear image of what happiness is to us is something that not a lot of people do. It is a block in the day that is leaving a gaping hole in the lives of so many. All it takes is 5 min. to close your eyes, write things down, breathe deeply and use your imagination. We do it when <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=esFAe2BDwIc" target="_blank">we're kids</a>. Everything has a glow of gold around it in our minds. Now what, we're going to let age and experience on this rock we call Earth take that brilliance of perception away from us? <br /><br />Don't fall for the <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0__syAUNfCs" target="_blank">misconception</a> that comfort in life is worth giving up that lovely slumberous thought of what your future could be. Live on the edge of life, no matter where you are or what you're doing. <br /><br /><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nWQXKJTlAQc" target="_blank">The only one holding you back is you.</a><br /><br />M.<br /><br />Merilovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06407393547792365687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8688139160689551780.post-65019772394107144442012-04-12T14:55:00.000-06:002012-04-12T14:55:14.527-06:00Picture This - My Visual Life Part 6<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
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So things have been busy as usual. I'm teaching quite a bit and am doing my usual running around. These are the events that have been happening in my day to day. Mmmmmmenjoy.</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Shad and Veelson can't seem to take their eyes off their HD tv. Kids these days..</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Made some Lemon Meringue pie for The Bear on his birthay with Lady Love. I decided when I say my name is Meri, I'll say, "Meri, as in Meringue" Eh? Eh? Clever.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The view on the way home from driving The Bear to work at 6am-ish. The Flat Lands do provide nice sunrises.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Spring is here!!! .. In the flower shops only. *Le Sigh*</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Was surprised with this when I got in the car after a class. The middle heart even has a little message on it! So thoughtful.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Hung out with my gangsta bitch. (Eldest Child) Twas a fun afternoon.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The reuniting of the children after about a year. It looks like Pup's snarling but I think she was just breathing out of the side of her mouth. This was the craziest it got, sadly enough. I was hoping for an uprising.</td></tr>
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I do have a few things floating around in this head of mine but alas, time is not on my side. Not to mention I've been sleepier than usual lately. That never helps production.But I have been taking a lot of pictures with my Cannon Eos. Maybe I'll post some of those as well. Fun times ahead!<br />
For now I shall carry on my merry way. <br /><br />Diddly dee potatoes,<br /><br />M.Merilovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06407393547792365687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8688139160689551780.post-79792525498199098292012-03-26T11:28:00.001-06:002012-03-26T11:30:32.295-06:00Happy Hearted WandererThis is for all who might have been feeling dull in the last few months. For the brains in the skulls of the people who have not yet felt the spring warmth that is trying desperately to remind them of the explorations to be had, the adventures to be taken on and the <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KiglLBLkzeg" target="_blank">Neverlands</a> that are in dire need of fumbling upon. A reminder, if you will, that this chill that is quite slowly fading, is not all that is out there as of right now. <br />
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The mist is slowly rising here in the Northern Flatland. It was thick as cooled cream this morning. I take so much joy in how gorgeous and yet dangerous something like water molecules in the air can be. I am so thrilled by the softness it creates but yet by the fact that you are at a high risk when your visual ability is so restricted with no ability to really change the setting or even help the situation all that much.<br />
It reminds me of the Valley and pulls so hard on my heart as my family was also recently here from said Valley Homeland.<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YYkrtSp8baE" target="_blank"> I miss it dearly</a>. The water content within a landscape changes everything. My body yearns to be hydrated by just the air itself. My skin is cracked and flaked in spite of the longevity of this stay in the Flatland. But as much as I am itching to leave, I think my mind is just taking the first sanctuary I know and making it my dreamland. <br />
Whereas, if I were just to up and travel, I'm sure that would do just fine. <br />
I love the idea of being able to take half a day to pack up all I have, shove it in my car, and drive to wherever. Or maybe, put all I own in a storage unit and fly off to some far off land. I am a little saddened by the fact that I settled here in the Flatland for so long rather than continuing my momentum and pushing onwards. I find myself losing that longing to be worldly and cultured the more that I settle in and plant roots. <br />
I know our plan for travel is very much laid out and scheduled, but the impatience is still there and so strong. Maybe it's just winter fever as well. The cold months can be so long and draining, it really takes a chunk out of ones spirit. <br />
Something that <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y1eOUNCDnmc&feature=related" target="_blank">keeps me going</a> though, is the pleasure I take out of little things. Like writing letters, drawing pictures, putting curious things in curiouser places, and so forth. A pass time I have previously indulged in is taking an old paperback novel and drawing in ballpoint on many random pages. Perhaps even cutting some out and splicing others in. Once I am satisfied with my work and have left enough room for others, I pass it on or leave it in a public place. I would love to track them but that isn't the important part.<br />
<a href="http://distilleryimage3.instagram.com/d09f4b9e776411e1b9f1123138140926_7.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://distilleryimage3.instagram.com/d09f4b9e776411e1b9f1123138140926_7.jpg" width="320" /></a>I think the solution to my unsettled mindset is just to <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e82i9HkIh4M&feature=related" target="_blank">reconnect</a> with that side of my mind. What with the union and uprooting of my belongings as of lately, I've not been nudging my creative side very much. Until I am ready in all ways to continue my wandering, I shall raise my clenched fist in the name of all things longing to be connected with far off places and press on in my strange and colourfully bumbling ways. <br />
Maybe this is just my own reminder. Perhaps this is purely something to tell myself that I am only as stuck as I allow myself to be. But you might be able to take this as your own <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RboZtRh3WY4" target="_blank">little finger tie</a> and change your rhythm. Ask yourself, honestly, if there is something that you are doing in life that is taking away from what is important. Don't be afraid of your answer, for it will only bring you more happiness once you've gotten it all sorted out. Find the hurdle, remove the hurdle, continue forward in your lovely meandering pathways to contentment. I'll do the same. <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XOFKjHDHkLk&feature=related" target="_blank">Together</a> we can take the problems that become so lumbering and tiresome and reveal them to be the small feathers in the wind that they are. Lets take our troubles and tribulations to the river and wash them away so to recycle the bad into the good and bring forth a clean slate of Spring and bloom.<br />
Creative creatures unite.<br />
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M.<br />
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All music dedicated to the soothing of the souls of The Wee One and Lady Love. May you rest well and tumble forwards to the acoustic sounds of the world.Merilovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06407393547792365687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8688139160689551780.post-89699531017679576922012-03-20T09:39:00.003-06:002012-03-20T09:39:41.059-06:00Picture This - My Visual Life Part 5<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The view from the kitchen in the evening time.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Yarn is now a constant part of my unconscious dream state. Lady Love has taught me to crochet. Oh dear.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Kitten Loves her new windows. Much happier in this home, me thinks.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Teaching much more leads to more sunning naps. Yoga studio approved.</td></tr>
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Many thoughts going through this brain of fluff. Not nearly enough time to sort through and write them down. May or may not be lost forever. Who knows. Doesn't help that I am now full of mucus and boogers (which equals being full of Buckley's and Bentasil) meaning creativity is quite lost. <br />Please send wishes of bettering and wellness.. or chocolate. That always makes things work properly.<br /><br />M.<br />Merilovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06407393547792365687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8688139160689551780.post-66314651531150149822012-03-14T10:26:00.003-06:002012-03-14T10:26:54.879-06:00Stopwatch Pause<a href="http://distilleryimage3.s3.amazonaws.com/9f9eb4d4671b11e180d51231380fcd7e_7.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://distilleryimage3.s3.amazonaws.com/9f9eb4d4671b11e180d51231380fcd7e_7.jpg" width="400" /></a>Ever taken a nap and woken up at a point in the day <br />where the sun may be just covered by clouds so that it looks like it could easily be dusk or dawn? For a second, there's a moment of disbelief that washes over you when you realize you could have potentially slept anywhere between 12 to 24 hours, depending on when you actually fell asleep. When this happens, I usually rush for my nearest electronic device to see what time and day it is. Now, checking what time it is, isn't too big of a deal. There are many situations I find myself in where I've lost track of time. It's when you have no idea of the date that really jars your mind. <br />It's a little funny how lost we become when that invisible road isn't laid out in front of us. <br />I was teaching a class and didn't have my phone on me. For some reason I figured that my Ipod didn't have a clock on it. I got 5 or so poses in when I had this thought and started to panic. Not wanting to break the flow of the class to ask if anyone could lend me a time device, I (somehow) figured I'd wing it and hope it turned out ok. That lasted all of 2 min. before I started to panic. My whole rhythm was thrown off and I started to rush a bit through the poses. <br />First of all, why I figured there was no means of telling time on an Ipod is unknown to me even now. Eventually I did discover the clock, thankfully. Secondly, why I thought I had any reason to panic is also a mystery. It is merely time, an illusion based on where the sun is during our "day to day" lives. <br />I understand that people want to feel as if we mean something. We want to feel as if we are fulfilling a purpose in existing. Which, in some ways we do. We affect the world and beyond just as much as it affects us.<br /><br />On my way home from teacher training, I was seated next to a man. We got to talking and he confessed that he was not the best flyer in the world. At that point, I had just been doing countless amounts of yoga every day, meditating religiously, and was eating mostly organic, home made, fresh food. Needless to say, I was feeling at peace. Somehow, the most nervous man on the plane was seated next to the girl who would have been floating if she'd sung one more mantra. I thought back to what my Mum (a nurse) would do when she was doing someone's I.V. She would distract them with having them tell her stories. Pets, family, work, interests, whatever got their minds off of the needle being shoved into them. Using her fine tactic, we talked about his dogs, yoga, and just life in general. <br />It worked for the most part until we hit some turbulence as we were going over the mountains. There were no clouds bu the wind was apparently quite strong and was jostling us around a bit. <br />I'm enjoying myself. I'm drunk with acceptance and ready to take on anything be it plane crash or a little wind. <br />As I'm calmly talking him out of his panic attack, I look out the window for a glimpse at the pristine mountain scape below. As I do, the plan drops. Not nose first, of course, but straight down. Everyone feels the gravity change as our weight gets pulled up, hips pressing against the seat belt and arms hovering just slightly for all of 2 seconds. We regain normality once again and I think to myself. I just plummeted in a plane over top of mountains, thousands of feet in the air. I could have died in the blink of an eye. It could have all been over, just like that.<br /><br /><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dai5e3lKh9I&feature=related" target="_blank"><b>I am so small.</b></a><br /><br />As much as we would like to think we are the center of everything, we also need to understand that we are despensable. Very much so. It takes very little to be able to wipe out a human life. Life in itself is fragile. Yet we cling to things like time and materials to try and shape our lives into a very detailed illusion. <br /><br />My challenge to myself and the people around me is to pause, the next time you see or hear a clock. Think. Every time that little line moves, a moment of your life has passed. The "future" hasn't come yet and never will. The "past" no longer exists except for the imprint it has left in your mind. Every time that hand, attached to a gear, powered by a battery, moves a little more, your life is happening. You are the only thing that matters right at that second and yet, you matter very little at all. Enjoy the vast scape of opposites that are pulling at you and take advantage of each ticktock you hear. What are you doing with those seconds? Where is your mind in this moment? <br />Maybe you'd like to take that challenge and run with it. Maybe you care to push it a bit further. If so, take even just 5 min (also the time it takes for 2 commercial breaks) and be in the moment. Don't allow your mind to wander from past to future and back again. Observe what is happening now. Allow yourself to be fully aware of this current state. <br />See what happens.<br /><br />M.<br /><br /><br />*All yoga classes and frightened men mentioned turned out just fine.Merilovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06407393547792365687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8688139160689551780.post-85627777260482282052012-03-08T14:42:00.004-07:002012-03-08T14:42:51.919-07:00A StoryIf you don't know me, I live in a fantasy world. It is a whole universe,
really, so it is quite diverse. But my favorite part is the forest.
There are many of them, all with different names and shapes. The one I
care to talk of today is the one I've been living in for the past year
or so. I've been looking for a change but I've been quite pleasantly
lost and have not yet found a map. The woodland creatures keep telling
me there is none and I must experience life to find my way around. I
would like to think I've taken their advice to heart and done just that
but, from time to time, it did bother me that I had still not come
across any different terrain. <br />
<div style="text-align: left;">
Until one day, some time ago, there was a call heard throughout the
trees. A meek and sad call, it was. It cried for help so pleadingly that
I answered softly. <br />
Turns out, a Bear dressed quite handsomely as a Lumberjack was in a daze
and required my assistance. He had lost what he thought was his love
and wanted to find that connection again. Little did he know, what he
knew as love was not as such. At the time, I didn't question it, but
feeling sorry for the poor thing, I agreed to put in my worth. I was to
teach him and his desired the ways of connection through movement and
mind. When the time came to bring the lessons to them, she had dashed
off, fearing many things and not wanting to take any risks. <br />
He shrugged and with a drained heart, asked if I would perhaps still
pass on my knowledge to him. I agreed, of course, for I believe in this
knowledge with my whole heart and know it will benefit anyone who
chooses to open to it. <br />
So I come to his cabin to practice with him. We talk for a while and
finally decide to get to work when we look at the time and realize hours
have passed! After a little training, we part ways. <br />
The next day he sends a squirrel to bring me the words "Either we are to
have the best of friendship immediately, or we are to be united by God.
in holy matrimony" I laugh, thinking back to how great his sense of
humor was in our lengthy conversation. I thought of how able he was to
get under my lily white skin with his challenges and honesty. How he
exercised his capability to pull from me all emotions ranging between
horribly uncomfortable to blissfully happy. He had shown me a whole new
gradient of life.<br />
From then on, I go to his abode upon a regular basis to have many an
enthralling conversation with him. Despite taking an enormous interest
in this warm hearted Bear, I exercise my rebellious side and tell him to
find love in other places. Win back the object of his previous desire,
find happiness in the Exotic Witch of Blonde and Ink, go and seek what
you are looking for. He proposes that he wait for someone special but I
push back with my iron will to test his character. <br />
In the meantime, I prance along, biding my time with the company of
friends. new and old. Not wanting to settle or land in one place for too
long, I leave my trail of sparkles wherever I go, all the while keeping
my sights on this strapping Bear. Until eventually my eyes start to
become clear and he sees the longing that hides behind them. He becomes
devious with his actions and words, mapping out an outcome with every
moment. His love for this light hearted fairy becomes overwhelmingly
large for his Bear chest, too much to contain, even. I daintily avoid
the strength of his charm while ever tempting him to push the envelope
more and more. Until eventually, with a soft will, he cools the fire of
my past, lays my heart down on a bed of rainbows and promises comfort
and adventure. <br />
The Wizard of Education then beccons him to live yonder for a time. I
travel between lands to be able to keep him in my ever changing, quickly
growing life. We struggle, we laugh, we play, until it comes to an end
and we rejoice. <br />
As we prepare for another change in scenery, he asks once again for our
lives to become one and I agree upon the allowance of me having my way. I
pick the ever fleeting day from the year of Leap to be united. And so
it begins, the curious ways of the Bear and the Fairy, tumbling wildly
through the forest. Turns out, the silly old Bear had the map the whole
time. He just needed me to be able to understand it. Though we are so
different and might not be in agreeance constantly, we are <b>choosing</b>
to love. And we are now to travel the lands together, facing dragons
and dungeons, mountains and sunrises, until as forever comes to an end.
With love from our woodland friends and support from our families of
Fairies and Bears, we venture off into the unique words of our combined
wonderlands where we shine light and laughter on every creature we come
across.<br />
<br />
And they lived whimsically ever after.<br />
<br />
M.</div>
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<img border="0" height="640" src="http://distilleryimage2.s3.amazonaws.com/1deaa00c655d11e1a87612313804ec91_7.jpg" width="640" /><a href="http://distilleryimage2.s3.amazonaws.com/1deaa00c655d11e1a87612313804ec91_7.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"> </a>Merilovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06407393547792365687noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8688139160689551780.post-69614715273931201982012-02-17T15:15:00.002-07:002012-02-17T15:29:21.607-07:00Apple Disection<a href="http://distilleryimage3.s3.amazonaws.com/98a7f08456cf11e1abb01231381b65e3_7.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://distilleryimage3.s3.amazonaws.com/98a7f08456cf11e1abb01231381b65e3_7.jpg" width="400" /></a>On The Bound by Fiona Apple, gently pulled apart as a tender serving of honesty that sometimes has a bit of cajaun spice soaked through it. It's been aged through the thought process of years of experience in my life and smoked with the woody residue of past moments as one living organism on this carbon grown rock we have seemed to have taken fondly to. <br />
<br />
<br />
<b>All my life is on me now, hail the pages turning
</b><br />
- Our whole lives depend on every moment. Every single little thought we have, whether as small as a reminder to grab the keys off the coffee table before locking the door or as big as what education to get/what career to follow. It is all happening now. There is actually no such thing as putting life on hold, for it is always moving no matter how much you try to control it.<br />
<br />
<b>And the future's on the bound, hell don't know my fury
</b><br />
- We seem to think that the future is way in front of us. For me at least, when someone says "the future" I think of waaay down the timeline of my life into certain predictions I'm making based on my past choices and whether I found them pleasureable or perhaps, helpful to what I find attractive. Yet there is an opposite side to every person. We all feel things such as anger and sometimes, eventually, bitterness. We often don't like to think about it but everyone has a breaking point. Some of them are further away than others whether due to circumstance or methods of improvement. <br />
<br />
<b>You're all I need, you're all I need, you're all I need
<br />You're all I need, you're all I need, you're all I need
<br />You're all I need - and maybe some faith would do me good
</b><br />
- People are strange. I don't know if I will ever know why we like to torture ourselves, in turn, making life harder for anyone and everyone around us, to the point of even just people we come in contact with. We usually have a bit of this need to please others and not listen to what is actually best for us, causing us to push against something good for the ability to achieve happiness in a projection of someone elses idea of "true". Maybe instead of pushing for understanding and control, a little confidence in the abilities one possesses, would actually work out. <br />
<br />
<b>I don't know what I'm doing, don't know, should I change my mind? I can't decide. There's too many variations to consider.</b><br />
- When you put your mind in that perspective of every moment being a choice of where on the actual Earth you will be (down the line), what type of person these choices will bring you up to be, the actual story of your journey, and why you ended up taking those specific steps, the whole idea of "life" can get very overwhelming.<br />
<br />
<b>Nothing I do, don't do, nothing but bring me more to do. It's true, I do imbue my blue unto myself,
<br />I make it bitter.</b><br />
- All those decisions you do end up making are going to do nothing more than bring you <b>more</b> choices to make due to the lack of knowledge that we have for what lays ahead. Some people may be able to gauge what is often done in comparison to the past but they have just as little of an actual prediction as anyone else. We're all on the same page with that one. Maybe it's the lack of that knowledge that makes someone get down on them self. Almost as if we expect to be able to have that ability and feel as if we've failed when it doesn't turn out in parallel with our prediction. Why we feel it is acceptable to beat anyone up about it (including ourselves) is beyond my understanding. How can we actually <b>blame</b> <b>time</b> on <i>anyone</i>? It's no wonder we reach out to whatever is around us. (People and objects of substance or action)<br />
<br />
<b>Baby, lay your head on my lap one more time, tell me you belong to me</b><br />
- I can't tell you where, but I've heard the sentence (almost a phrase) "people are social creatures" quite a bit. To the point of it being an obvious fact in my head. But when I think of how that is true and verbalize facts behind it, I see that as a person, a friend, a group, a community, a society, a civilization, we exude that theory repeatedly. Because of our diversity, there are always exceptions (with everything, not just this). But for the most part I can't think of a single person that I know of, that would rather be fully alone for the rest of their lives than put up with the majority of people <b>purely</b> for the sake of human interaction. We will put ourselves through hell and back, just to get a taste of belonging and connection. To have that sense of "right" with someone else (be it a lie or otherwise). <br />
<br />
<b>Baby say that it's all gonna be alright, I believe that it isn't.</b><br />
- Blame it on ego or what have you, but people are stubborn, misinformed, and stubbornly misinformed. We love to rebel and push against what may or may not be there. We flail and spit at the void in our views (for nothing is anything but a perspective) with an expectation that if we keep ourselves clinging, we'll eventually gather strength, thinking, under the surface, "I can keep this going, I know I can." Someone will quite often take any encouragement they can to keep that ball moving even though, we know what is really best for us. If we took the time to stop distracting ourselves from confusion with more confusion, whatever we look for (question or answer) will always be right in front of our face, just waiting for our eyes to actually notice it. <br />
<br />
Don't agree? Feel the need to go into further detail? Why not express your differences and reciprocity with other personalities? How can we be so afraid of being "wrong" when no one 100% knows exactly, to the last and tiniest detail, what wrong is?<br />
<br />
<br />
M.Merilovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06407393547792365687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8688139160689551780.post-87070120739137864732012-02-08T11:16:00.001-07:002012-02-08T11:16:28.957-07:00Results May Vary<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://distilleryimage11.instagram.com/64152fce528011e19e4a12313813ffc0_7.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://distilleryimage11.instagram.com/64152fce528011e19e4a12313813ffc0_7.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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I'm sure most people have heard this before. My Mum would tell me to do something, usually chores related, and I, being the feisty little child I had the tendency of being, would look her dead in the eyes and ask, "Why?" <br />Her usual response was to say "Because I told you to!" As she threw her hands up in the air, I'm sure growing overly tired of having this small minded being question every little thing she presents to the situation. (<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ezCXuSxVEWs" target="_blank">Sorry Mum)</a> Needless to say, if you know me at all, I've not changed much. I still push the limits of the facts that are put in front of me. I still challenge whatever I am able to. Much to some peoples dismay..<br /><br />I've been realizing the value of kindness lately. When I close my eyes and see this mental image of what that word gives me, I see a bunch of people in a circle, holding hands and being friendly with each other. That is just the still picture. If I look at the word "kindness" as an action, it takes on a whole different meaning. Just like music, art, yoga, and love, community is an action. You can choose to include it in every choice that is made during ones day. <br />Take art for example. I could do this more, but I do try and include it into every part of my day. Whether that is just sketching on napkins at a restaurant, forcing myself to paint every day, or just drawing hearts in the dust at someone's house. Creating images can be done at any time, any place. It's about putting the effort forth to make it happen with whatever material that may be available. <br />Love is a little harder to do this with sometimes. As humans, we tend to think the world revolves around us as a singular person. "<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BIvka3SSv9Y" target="_blank">My world is more important than yours</a>, my problems are more substantial, my ideas are better, brighter, bigger. I'm right. You're wrong" We might not want to admit it but we all allow it to happen. Now the action of love is to be able to break through that wall, see the other persons perspective as best you can, then change your own mind, perspective, or even go against your best logic. That's what is hardest for me. Going against logic for the sake of trust, faith, or love. Seems like the dumbest thing to do. But yet, if we would bring a little bit of that empty minded, over the rainbow, cheese ball romance into our lives every once in a while, maybe our relationships would have a bit more forgiveness. <br />Faith<span class="pronset"><span class="show_spellpr" style="display: inline;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span class="prondelim"><br />[</span><span class="pron">feyth</span><span class="prondelim">]</span></span><span class="pron_toggle" style="display: inline;"></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="pg" style="color: black; font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="cursor: default;">noun</span> </span></span><div class="luna-Ent" style="color: black; font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<a href="http://distilleryimage3.instagram.com/925aef78527f11e180c9123138016265_7.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://distilleryimage3.instagram.com/925aef78527f11e180c9123138016265_7.jpg" width="400" /></a><span class="dnindex"><span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="cursor: default;">1.</span> </span></span><div class="dndata">
<span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="cursor: default;">confidence</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">or</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">trust</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">in</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">a</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">person</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">or</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">thing:</span> </span><span class="ital-inline"><span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword">faith</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">in</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">another's</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="cursor: default;">ability.</span> </span></span></div>
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<span class="dnindex" style="color: black;"><span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword">2.</span> </span></span><div class="dndata">
<span id="hotword" style="color: black;"><span id="hotword" name="hotword">belief</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">that</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">is</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">not</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">based</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="cursor: default;">on</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="cursor: default;">proof:</span> </span><span class="ital-inline"><span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: black; cursor: default;">He</span><span style="color: black;"> </span><span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: black;">had</span><span style="color: black;"> </span><span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: black; cursor: default;">faith</span><span style="color: black;"> </span><span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: black;">that</span><span style="color: black;"> </span><span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: black;">the</span><span style="color: black;"> </span><span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: black;">hypothesis</span><span style="color: black;"> </span><span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: black;">would</span><span style="color: black;"> </span><span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: black;">be</span><span style="color: black;"> </span><span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: black;">substantiated</span><span style="color: black;"> </span><span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: black;">by</span><span style="color: black;"> </span><span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: black; cursor: default;">fact.<br />It goes against everything <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gVAnlke_xUY" target="_blank">within me</a>. I want tangible, touchable, viewable, truth. I want my senses to be able to tell me, "Yes, this exists. You may believe it." To be able to trust, have faith, in something, someone, is quite hard for me. <br />Mum made a good point, as blunt as it was. Because I said so is just as much of a reason as the reason she could have explained. Because really, who is to say that it's even believable. The point is, do you want to do it to fight it, for results, or because you want to do it. <br />I see the point of community as doing something for the sake of doing it. For the sake of someone other than yourself. And though there is no such thing as <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=48K5Y0421Ig" target="_blank">selflessness</a> because the reason anyone does anything is for ones own happiness. "It makes me happy that you're happy." But to do something for the sake of the action itself is quite the feat. There is no failure! No disappointment. Once you've completed the action, the result is obsolete. If something good <b>does </b>come of it, so be it! If not, you weren't expecting anything anyway. <br /><br />It has become something I want to include into my daily choices. Do something for the sake of doing it. For the sake of someone else outside of myself. Actions such as those are sure to come back to a person in reward. <br /><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zTFBJgnNgU4&ob=av2e" target="_blank">But who cares?</a><br /><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UBfK3j6Hs00&ob=av2e" target="_blank">M.</a></span> </span></span></div>
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<br />Merilovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06407393547792365687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8688139160689551780.post-67553283772477658222012-01-25T14:44:00.002-07:002012-01-25T14:44:19.390-07:00Unidentifiable Space<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://distilleryimage6.s3.amazonaws.com/24b2bcd23b2611e1a87612313804ec91_7.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://distilleryimage6.s3.amazonaws.com/24b2bcd23b2611e1a87612313804ec91_7.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
Ever look through a l<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=32XgV32ywhM" target="_blank">ens of a train </a>light? Those things are magnified so much that you could put a little light behind it and it would look like the heavens are opening in front of you. They take normal looking and mutilate it into an unidentifiable mash of colour. <br />I've been trying to explore my Yin practice more lately but I've been realizing how much <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JSi1SLsIEb0&feature=related" target="_blank">fear is held in our bodies</a>. There are so many poses where I'll be in it for a matter of breaths and suddenly get this great urge to get out of it and even stop doing my daily practice all together. It becomes so important to me to stop stretching and breathing that I feel like if I don't, the world will end and I'll implode into a puff of dust. My mind is putting this lens on my situation, taking it and expanding it so deeply that I can no longer see it for what it is. I'm not processing it as muscles expanding, mind being oxygenated, ligaments being stressed, ect. I'm seeing it as an emotional wreckage that needs to be avoided. All I'm doing is bringing more air into the tissue of my body and yet it's this turmoil of stress and anger. <br />I find that people do this in their <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o2zf28T0LFU&feature=related" target="_blank">daily lives</a> as well. We get so wrapped up in our emotions, possessions, situations, abilities and capacities that we don't see it from an outside perspective. Which is why friends or counselors are always a good idea. People who aren't afraid to tell you the truth for your own betterment. Which will hopefully teach us to do it for ourselves and not depend on the people around us. Eventually, we can watch our own thoughts, our own mind processes and habits and see ourselves for what we are. <br />Just humans. <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=itGkNAoA3tI" target="_blank">In 93 billion light years of space</a>. <br /><br />M.<br /><br />Fall to sleep<br />
Fall to sleep<br />
It's you I long to keep<br />
This room will never stay still for you and me<br />
<br />Merilovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06407393547792365687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8688139160689551780.post-4470923750424053432012-01-03T10:53:00.002-07:002012-01-03T10:53:53.591-07:00Picture This - My Visual Life Part 4<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />A visual scattering of my life in the last two weeks:<br /><br /><img border="0" height="400" src="http://distilleryimage9.instagram.com/2b92dbd6363011e1abb01231381b65e3_7.jpg" width="400" /><br />Sibs of the younger variety. </div>
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<img border="0" height="400" src="http://distilleryimage10.instagram.com/9b98beba362f11e180c9123138016265_7.jpg" width="400" /><br /><br />A family picture taking we did. I decided this was classier. </div>
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<img border="0" height="400" src="http://distilleryimage0.instagram.com/6431983e362f11e19e4a12313813ffc0_7.jpg" width="400" /><br />Downtown Van. All of the lights.</div>
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<img border="0" height="400" src="http://distilleryimage0.instagram.com/379770aa362f11e19896123138142014_7.jpg" width="400" /><br />Oh the boys of the New Year. SweetK was the photographer. Adding her feminine touch.<br /><br /><img border="0" height="400" src="http://distilleryimage11.instagram.com/c7e398a0362f11e19896123138142014_7.jpg" width="400" /><br />China. Town.</div>
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<img border="0" height="400" src="http://distilleryimage11.s3.amazonaws.com/7dc67d4a2f9b11e19896123138142014_7.jpg" width="400" /><br /><br />Meeting the neighbors. <br /></div>
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<img border="0" height="400" src="http://distilleryimage11.instagram.com/e902eeee363111e180c9123138016265_7.jpg" width="400" /><br />7 floors of booky gooodness.</div>
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<img border="0" height="400" src="http://distilleryimage9.instagram.com/2601769e363211e1abb01231381b65e3_7.jpg" width="400" /><br />Going through my old photo albums of when I was wee. Found this gem of my late Oma and I. The sun was bright that day and my red balloon was much loved. <br /></div>
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<br />So my trip to the coast was lovely to say the least. I got to fully experience both sides of the scale between pulling my hair out with how crazy my family drives me and loving the nurturing kindness they would supply. Also, I am quite built for the moist ocean air. It agreed with me muchly. I miss the forest, the dew, the fog, the puddles, the freshness. <br /><br />Time is pulling my life into a good direction. I now have the ability to focus my energy in scheduled segments on myself and on others rather than mixing and mashing my self time and social life. It's going to be a good couple months, I think. And when spring rolls around, it can only get better. Flowers will bring a new wind of change and who knows where I'll be at that point? I have love, peace, melody and balance as my starting point of this year.<br /><br />Why, hello 2012, I surrender to you.<br /><br />"In this moment, what is lacking?"<br /><br />M.</div>
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<br />Merilovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06407393547792365687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8688139160689551780.post-6995800484874268912011-12-13T14:59:00.000-07:002011-12-13T14:59:18.124-07:00Hunker Down<div style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
I have been viewing some lovely scenes of city life in the last couple days. I love looking over a city and focusing on every little light in every building on every street. It is often too much for my mind to contain all at once and I find myself drifting into other random thoughts but the contrast between the peace that I feel from having this higher physical vantage point in comparison to the bustling business of city life brings me an ease. One of the random thoughts I was having was about the scene in Amelie when she's looking over her city.</div>
<pre style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"> "</span><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-size: small;">Time hasn't changed anything. Amélie still shelters in solitude and asks herself silly questions about the
world or about this town. For example, how many couples are having an orgasm right now?
-Fifteen ."
We have as many choices as we can fathom. We are capable of anything. Which leads me to ask:</span></span></pre>
<br style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;" /><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">What is </span><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o96r6qr9CEw" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;" target="_blank">commitment? </a><br />
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<a href="http://distilleryimage0.instagram.com/ff40d2c625d211e1abb01231381b65e3_7.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://distilleryimage0.instagram.com/ff40d2c625d211e1abb01231381b65e3_7.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<h2 class="me">
com·mit</h2>
<span class="pronset" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> <span class="show_spellpr" style="display: inline;"><span class="prondelim">[</span><span class="pron">k<span class="ital-inline">uh</span>-<span class="boldface">mit</span></span><span class="prondelim">]</span> <a href="http://dictionary.reference.com/help/luna/Spell_pron_key.html" target="_blank"><img border="0" class="luna-Img" src="http://sp.dictionary.com/dictstatic/g/d/dictionary_questionbutton_default.gif" /></a> <span class="pron_toggle" style="display: inline;"><a alt="Toggle for IPA" class="pronlink" href="" title="Click to show IPA">Show IPA</a> </span></span></span><span class="pg" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword">verb,</span> </span></span><span class="secondary-bf" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword">-mit·ted,</span> </span><span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: #333333; cursor: default;">-mit·ting.</span> </span></span> </div>
<span class="pg" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: #333333; cursor: default;">verb</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: #333333; cursor: default;">(used</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: #333333; cursor: default;">with</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">object)</span> </span></span><div class="luna-Ent" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span class="dnindex"><span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: #333333; cursor: default;">1.</span></span></span><span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword"> to</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">give</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: #333333; cursor: default;">in</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">trust</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">or</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">charge;</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">consign.</span> </span></div>
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<span class="dnindex"><span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword">2.</span></span></span><span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword"> to</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">consign</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: #333333; cursor: default;">for</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">preservation:</span> </span><span class="ital-inline"><span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword">to</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">commit</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">ideas</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">to</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">writing;</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">to</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">commit</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">a</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: #333333; cursor: default;">poem</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">to</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">memory.</span> </span></span></div>
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<span class="dnindex"><span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword">3.</span></span></span><span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword"> to</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">pledge</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: #333333; cursor: default;">(oneself)</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">to</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">a</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">position</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">on</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">an</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">issue</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">or</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">question;</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">express</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">(one's</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: #333333; cursor: default;">intention,</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">feeling,</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">etc.):</span> </span><span class="ital-inline"><span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword">Asked</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">if</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">he</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">was</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">a</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">candidate,</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">he</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: #333333; cursor: default;">refused</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: #333333; cursor: default;">to</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">commit</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">himself.</span> </span></span></div>
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<span class="dnindex"><span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword">4.</span></span></span><span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword"> to</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">bind</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">or</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">obligate,</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">as</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">by</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: #333333; cursor: default;">pledge</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">or</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">assurance;</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">pledge:</span> </span><span class="ital-inline"><span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword">to</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">commit</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">oneself</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">to</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">a</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: #333333; cursor: default;">promise;</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">to</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">be</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">committed</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">to</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">a</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">course</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">of</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">action.</span> </span></span></div>
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<span class="dnindex"><span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword">5.</span></span></span><span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword"> to</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">entrust,</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">especially</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">for</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: #333333; cursor: default;">safekeeping</span></span></div>
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<span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: #333333; cursor: default;"></span></span></div>
<div class="luna-Ent" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: #333333; cursor: default;"></span></span></div>
<div class="luna-Ent" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: #333333; cursor: default;"></span></span></div>
<div class="luna-Ent" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<a href="http://distilleryimage5.instagram.com/d7aa2d8e25d211e19e4a12313813ffc0_7.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://distilleryimage5.instagram.com/d7aa2d8e25d211e19e4a12313813ffc0_7.jpg" width="400" /></a><span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: #333333; cursor: default;"><br />Some words that pop out to me are: trust, pledge, and bind.<br /><br />Are we as humans capable of doing such things? I choose to believe that everything should be considered an option. Nothing is impossible. Our minds give us limits due to the inability to understand or comprehend. We know very little. So how are we able to have such a confidence in something to the point of being able to trust or commit? It's almost as if we're saying, "I will control my future to the smallest degree" which I see as being impossible. Chance happens. <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kwPZmcgUBJM&feature=related" target="_blank">Time happens</a>. Who's to say something won't rewire the mind and change the perspective? If all we are is circuits firing off electrons to receptors, how can we say that nothing will change our opinions? <br /><br />Is there such a thing as real commitment? Real trust? Can we actually bind ourselves to one thing? One mind frame, one way of life, one ideal? <br /><br />Maybe that is why marraige is such a sacred thing. It's romantic, foolish, hopeful, created by faith and ignorance. It is thrusting yourself into a singular path and assuming that it will last. Working for a common goal, sure. But no two minds are exactly the same. People will have differing ideas no matter what the end goal is. How are we to jump off that ledge and hope for <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ntoMKM0ToP0&feature=related" target="_blank">happiness</a>? <br /><br />A subject that needs to be discussed with one of more wisdom.<br /><br />M.<br /></span></span><span class="ital-inline"><span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword"></span> </span></span></div>
<br />Merilovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06407393547792365687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8688139160689551780.post-36380372208140221382011-12-02T17:19:00.001-07:002011-12-02T17:38:32.797-07:00It's All Good<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif; font-weight: normal;">What if you're already doing everything right, even though you're not sure? </span></div>
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<a href="http://distilleryimage10.instagram.com/e4a32e041d4511e180c9123138016265_7.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://distilleryimage10.instagram.com/e4a32e041d4511e180c9123138016265_7.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<h6 class="uiStreamMessage" data-ft="{"type":1}">
<a href="http://distilleryimage10.instagram.com/bca43eca1d4511e19e4a12313813ffc0_7.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://distilleryimage10.instagram.com/bca43eca1d4511e19e4a12313813ffc0_7.jpg" width="400" /></a><span class="messageBody" data-ft="{"type":3}"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif; font-weight: normal;">And the surprises along the way have only sped you up, even though it feels like they slowed you down?</span><br style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif; font-weight: normal;" /><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif; font-weight: normal;"> And all you want is now barreling towards you even though you can't see it?</span><br style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif; font-weight: normal;" /><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif; font-weight: normal;"> And when it arrives, it will exceed your expectation, even though your dreams were huge?<br />A little email I got this morning spoke this to my tired eyeballs. It triggered a pretty massive switch in my head. For from then on, I had quite the eventful day. Went for breakfast with Lady Love at an amazing place in town, now have some fantastic leftovers, and talked the morning away of good times that are past, fun times of the future and just how small we really are. Almost as if our lives collided again and we were just overflowing with mind clutter that needed releasing. It's good to have friends who really accept you and yet are capable of keeping you accountable and calling you out on your bullshit and imbalance. We even busted out in a couple yoga flows! I guess it's almost expected when instructors get together. Typical.<br />It's nice to have days like these where you realize how small life is and how lovely it can be when you let it. When you see how little our problems are and trust that everything is nothing, it all gets a little easier to handle. Sure, it could be considered "unrealistic" but this is an often very depressing world we live in. So much can change from the littlest of things. All you need is a quick switch of thought and Bob's your Uncle, you're happy! Or at least a bit better. <br /><br /><br />The only thing that is stopping you, is you.<br /><br />M.</span></span></span></h6>Merilovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06407393547792365687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8688139160689551780.post-3344956160939925682011-12-01T10:01:00.001-07:002011-12-01T10:48:48.426-07:00What Do You Got?In need of some good toons? Lucky for you, this post is riddled with warm cabin beats. Ready to thaw your winter heart and fill your chest with sugar and spice. You've already got "everything nice".<br /><br /><br />At a little wooden cabin<br />
<a href="http://distilleryimage4.s3.amazonaws.com/a96deab6130111e1abb01231381b65e3_7.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://distilleryimage4.s3.amazonaws.com/a96deab6130111e1abb01231381b65e3_7.jpg" width="400" /></a>Up in northern Minnesota<br />
We ran together down to the dock<br />
And you jumped right off it<br />
And from out in the water<br />
You called me to join you<br />
And I said, "Baby, I cannot swim
If I jump, I'll surely drown you"<br />
You said, "Life has no limit
If you're not afraid to get in it"<br />
And oh, baby, I jumped to you<br />
Since then there's nothing I can't do <br /><br />
I'm never gonna give you up
<br />
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TQV7OvhgHHA">What do you got if you ain't got love?</a><br />
If you ain't got love<br />
What do you got if you ain't got love?
<br /><br />Someday, someday soon
<br />You and I will both be gone
<br />And lately, I can't help but think
<br />That the love we feel will live on
<br /><br />I find this in myself and see it constantly in people in general. We tend to retreat from "the light", if you will. One of my goals in life is to understand why. Why does holding back, being withdrawn and sad seem so tempting? Why do we continue to choose to wallow in our sorrow rather than choose to let go of what is wrong in our lives?
<br /><br />I find it slightly entertaining when people fully admit how unaware of self they are and have no interest in knowing anything under the surface thoughts of their mind. What is luring about <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MVnIrXtBHJ0" target="_blank">self destruction</a>? Why not explore and change? Why not "play God" and manipulate the inner workings of the thought process? The walls we put up to ourselves and the people around us are actually quite easy to demolish and yet we choose to reinforce them over and over. <br /><br /><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mFCMIAYPw7w" target="_blank">I'm not perfect</a>. There are multitudes of walls that I've stableized in my life. It's hard to catch when you've built one at the best of times. But I figure if I change one thought at a time, it will eventually bring me to a place where I realize I've taken leaps in a great direction. If you keep putting one penny in the jar from time to time, eventually you'll have a heavy jar full of riches.<br /><br />It's the little choices that count. The smaller moments of enjoying the lack of categorizing and predicting what's next. It's the times when you look out a window and enjoy the view. The times of standing back and looking at a completed job well done and admiring your handy work. It's the moment's of "what was I doing again?" and that space between asking that question and finding the answer. It's the moment of pent up frustration starting to boil over and strangely enough, there's a feeling of needing to be comforted and you take on the responsibility yourself and take a massive breath, letting out all the angst and dirt. It's that moment of carrying onwards. <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3F074HqUiFU" target="_blank">Smiling, no matter what</a>.<br /><br />Someday, someday soon
<br />
You and I will both be gone
<br />
And lately, I can't help but think
<br />
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5XQ2tMGsjrI" target="_blank">That the love we feel will live on</a><br /><br />M.<br /><br /><br />Merilovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06407393547792365687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8688139160689551780.post-30513539313424511382011-11-28T16:08:00.004-07:002011-11-28T16:43:18.906-07:00Feel Good 'Bout What You're Dreaming OfEver catch someone's eye and notice that they're smiling? For the most part, if and when it happens to me, I usually can't help but smile back. Or at least bashfully look away. People love people. We all love human connection and crave it. We want to be social and happy. Which brings me to my point.<br /><br />My world view has been renewed and refreshed into a heart throb of sunshine and kitten kisses. <br />Don't you worry. I plan on recycling it all right back. <br /><br />Sometimes when life is going a little slow, things are getting a bit rough, the grit of the real world sets in a little and you feel that impending string of bad choices crouching in behind you as you watch the ideal balanced mindset to slip slightly. <br />I've had a couple conversations in the last couple days about when these types of things happen to people and the reactions that they allow themselves to have.<br /><br />There is truth in the cliche's that we use so often. "Life is what you make it" Being a big one.<br /><br />The reaction people choose to have to the situations around them are what count. They are what makes up a personality, an attitude, a feeling. <br /><br />Life, the universe, God, Buddha, Gandolf, or whomever suits your fancy, decided to put things in place to bring a huge gift of happiness and future possibility into my life today. My ability to express my thankfulness and gratitude is not adequate. I will say that the person that set it up and made it happen is a dear friend of mine. A mentor, if you will. A person of great wisdom and logic. Few people have the ability to shine quite as effeciently and deeply as this one does. <br /><br />Though I've done this before, I'd like to put out there how much I appreciate the people in my life. Because of this and the overwhelming goodness that I see so frequently in my friends, I will make this act of kindness contagious and spread it as far and deeply as I can. <br /><br />Love you long time,<br />M.Merilovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06407393547792365687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8688139160689551780.post-33980313947528893212011-11-09T17:59:00.004-07:002011-11-09T18:23:31.635-07:00Mind Rewrite<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://distilleryimage7.instagram.com/fd736bd20a5911e1abb01231381b65e3_7.jpg"><img style="float: right; margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 400px;" src="http://distilleryimage7.instagram.com/fd736bd20a5911e1abb01231381b65e3_7.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a>It is a challenge. A challenge, I tell you. Sure, knowing that the sun is behind the overcast umbrella above you is obvious. But knowing that the same energy, the same ball of fire, the "prana", the life force, be all and end all, is within you isn't easy.<br />I'll tell you what is easy. Swimming in thought. Allowing everything to muddle up in the mind and well over like the tantrum tears of a three year old. Swallowing that thought, that mindset of "I am my thoughts" and seeing that nugget of chocolatey goodness beyond, somehow proves to be one of the most difficult things I've ever done.<br />As the lovely Lauryn Hill says<br />"These buildings could drift out to sea<br />Some natural catastrophe<br />Still there's no place I'd rather be<br />Cos nothin' even matters to me"<br />Why do we allow thoughts to have such control? What is so great about over analyzing everything to the nth degree?<br /><br />I had a lovely conversation with a new friend the other day. A young thing of simplistic wisdom. They were talking about how short of time we have on <a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://distilleryimage0.instagram.com/38af4f5e0a5f11e180c9123138016265_7.jpg"><img style="float: left; margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 400px;" src="http://distilleryimage0.instagram.com/38af4f5e0a5f11e180c9123138016265_7.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a>this earth. How we have so many options and only a pinch of ability to utilize them all. And yet we choose to numb, distort, distract and divert from the essence of living. From things that are a part of our essential nature. We stray from love for the sake of fear. We push happiness to the side for the growth of greed. We put ourselves in situations of blaming others for things that we can so easily take responsibility for.<br /><br />My question is, "why?" If you have hung out with me for more than an hour, you'll know I ask that question a lot. I'm learning to be more specific so I ask, why distract from goodness?<br />What are your distortions? What do you use as a crutch for your choices? Who do you blame for your emotional states?<br />Everyone does it, so why not dig a little deeper?<br /><br />M.<br /><br />P.S.<br />I know the pictures have very little to do with the words but I found them to be interesting visuals, for what it's worth.Merilovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06407393547792365687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8688139160689551780.post-50925895969095500312011-11-04T12:29:00.005-06:002011-11-04T13:11:40.147-06:00Where It Comes FromSo there is a lot going on in this brain of fluff. I'm not only reading The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle but The 5th Agreement by Don Miguel Ruiz which was given to me by a lovely lady I know from the coffee shop I used to work at and go to regularly. She saw the Power of Now on the table beside me and asked me if I'd read the 5th Agreement. Then insisted on buying it for me. Karmic acts like that really make me satisfied.<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://distilleryimage8.instagram.com/a97f2800071511e180c9123138016265_7.jpg"><img style="float: right; margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 400px;" src="http://distilleryimage8.instagram.com/a97f2800071511e180c9123138016265_7.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a><br />Anyway, these are the visuals that are setting of sparks in my head. I've been painting quite a bit and due to a good friend, if not a Mentor of mine, saying that I have to have 2 finished paintings to show by Monday. It's nice to have a bit of structure with painting other than the flexible goals that I put in myself. When I finish them I'll post some pictures. Hopefully I'll put them up before the end of January.In the meantime, here are some creative inspirations that are pushing me forwards. <a href="http://www.doodlersanonymous.com/"><br /><br />Doodles of the Creative</a><br /><br /><a href="http://lumper.blogspot.com/">Lumps of Art Gold</a><br /><br /><a href="http://jvpurcell.tumblr.com/">Words to Love By (Personal friend and favorite)</a><br /><br /><a href="http://www.indie-guest.it/">Inventing Craftiness </a><br /><br /><a href="http://www.bluecanvas.com/">Mag That Brings Out the Best</a><br /><br />The only real photo opportunity I've experienced is at the pool with The Boys I babysit from time to time. That was interesting. Being a lady of my early 20's with two boys of the ages of 6 and 8. I must have looked like I was doing pretty good for a Mother in my 30's. I admittedly got some strange looks while wrestling around with them.<br /><br />I have also been getting back into Fiona Apple as of recently. I had forgotten how much I relate to her moodiness and how well her voice falls on my ears.<br /><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BK30r_SIZ-g">Her top song in my opinion.</a><br />I hope to some day have an ability that merely shadows hers. Her talent in c<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://distilleryimage9.instagram.com/bb52ef7e071711e1a87612313804ec91_7.jpg"><img style="float: right; margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 400px;" src="http://distilleryimage9.instagram.com/bb52ef7e071711e1a87612313804ec91_7.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a>omposition and lyricism is impeccable.<br /><br />I wish I could post some awesome photos on here but I really haven't been doing much picture taking. At some point, I'd like to buy a couple more rolls of film and fill up the Pentax I've got sitting on my shelf. It's just calling my name and now I've missed the most gorgeous time of year! Oh well, there's always beauty to capture.<br />I SHOULD have taken more Halloween pictures but apparently my head is elsewhere. I have some on my little point and shoot but they're not exactly quality.<br />All I have to show for my creative adventures as of late is the coil notebook that I stuck with clippings from the blue canvas mag I have (link posted above) which I think turned out quite well. I need to make a bit harder of a backing for it because the glue has curled the cardboard, but it gives it a bit of character.<br />I'm using the notebook to write out songs and doodles. It's quite nice to have the ability to express so freely now. I feel almost as if there has been a blockage that has been broken and now I'm flowing freely.<br />Now to get back on the yoga train. Dear oh dear.<br /><br />I'm sure at some point I will be posting my opinion of how the books are affecting my life. Until then;<br /><br />Ta for now,<br /><br />M.Merilovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06407393547792365687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8688139160689551780.post-58625974960333177702011-10-25T12:16:00.004-06:002011-10-25T12:55:04.922-06:00Picture this - My Visual Life .2Other than a wee trip to the mountains for a night, I haven't been doing much with my time but I figured I would post some pictures, if not to encourage myself to document and be more adventurous.<br />So as slight as it may be, this is what mine eyes hath seen:<br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://images.instagram.com/media/2011/10/25/af495b203f7548dda3c347587b979096_7.jpg"><img style="display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 450px; height: 450px;" src="http://images.instagram.com/media/2011/10/25/af495b203f7548dda3c347587b979096_7.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a>Went for lunch at the best little restaurant in town with Lady Love whom I get to spend more time with now that she's free of schooling for a while. Good food, good conversation, good times.<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://images.instagram.com/media/2011/10/25/af495b203f7548dda3c347587b979096_7.jpg"><br /></a><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://images.instagram.com/media/2011/10/23/6285c8e3dc0748edb22b4765bb412a39_7.jpg"><img style="display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 450px; height: 450px;" src="http://images.instagram.com/media/2011/10/23/6285c8e3dc0748edb22b4765bb412a39_7.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a><br />Lady Love with her gorgeous luscious eyes enjoying an eggplant po'boy. Ain't she a doll?<br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://images.instagram.com/media/2011/10/24/1f586044ac5942259ba76247621116cd_7.jpg"><img style="display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 450px; height: 450px;" src="http://images.instagram.com/media/2011/10/24/1f586044ac5942259ba76247621116cd_7.jpg" alt="" border="0" /><br /></a>This seems to be the activities of the majority of my nights as of lately. The cat seems to enjoy it.<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://images.instagram.com/media/2011/10/24/1f586044ac5942259ba76247621116cd_7.jpg"><br /><br /><br /></a><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://images.instagram.com/media/2011/10/25/97ae9fcdbb4d448888da3b1f63a94f72_7.jpg"><img style="display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 450px; height: 450px;" src="http://images.instagram.com/media/2011/10/25/97ae9fcdbb4d448888da3b1f63a94f72_7.jpg" alt="" border="0" /><br /></a><br />My Man and I in the shadow of the mountains and the light of the morning sun. He somehow convinced me we were just going to Calgary to dick around in the mall for a day trip. How I didn't catch on, I have no idea.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://images.instagram.com/media/2011/10/22/9e29a787eef042fd8e12c748ac4113f7_7.jpg"><img style="display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 450px; height: 450px;" src="http://images.instagram.com/media/2011/10/22/9e29a787eef042fd8e12c748ac4113f7_7.jpg" alt="" border="0" /><br /></a>Some wildlife we saw on the way. There was also a Semi V.S. Moose fight in front of us on the road there. Sure, it would've broken my heart, but you don't get to see that kind of thing every day.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://distillery.s3.amazonaws.com/media/2011/10/21/62de54dae28f41b5802187379928bc74_7.jpg"><img style="display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 450px; height: 450px;" src="http://distillery.s3.amazonaws.com/media/2011/10/21/62de54dae28f41b5802187379928bc74_7.jpg" alt="" border="0" /><br /></a>The hotel we stayed at had an assortment of wildlife growing from the walls. We were reminded a few times of how "Beauty and the Beast" it was. We even had the pleasure of hearing singing in the streets!<br /><br />Its funny, I was sick for a bit and couldn't go to any classes in that time. I also figured that not meditating would be a good idea as well and have been slacking with that for the past while. As much as I would love to say that it was a bad idea, I'm kind of thanking myself for taking that break. Granted, it's hard to get back into it but it's nice to see how drastically those two things change your life.<br /><br />As shown above, I've been given the book "The Power of Now" By Eckhart Tolle. I've read it once before a couple years back and it changed my life then so I am hoping for it to evoke some more radical movements in my life this time around as well. I plan on referencing it from time to time and maybe even working through some of my thoughts about it on here. Hopefully it causes some shifts in thoughts.<br /><br />Until then, I leave with the quote:<br /><br />"Watch the thinker, you are not your thoughts"<br /><br />M.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://distillery.s3.amazonaws.com/media/2011/10/21/62de54dae28f41b5802187379928bc74_7.jpg"><br /></a>Merilovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06407393547792365687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8688139160689551780.post-123704985434254132011-10-22T17:05:00.003-06:002011-10-22T17:24:29.419-06:00Catch the Bullet<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://images.instagram.com/media/2011/10/22/e9f00ea2e5d44972b9a91627d4770a55_7.jpg"><img style="float: right; margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 400px;" src="http://images.instagram.com/media/2011/10/22/e9f00ea2e5d44972b9a91627d4770a55_7.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://images.instagram.com/media/2011/10/22/19eac34b75f244b089048601781cc6fb_7.jpg"><img style="float: right; margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 400px;" src="http://images.instagram.com/media/2011/10/22/19eac34b75f244b089048601781cc6fb_7.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a><br />When she was just a girl<br />She expected the world<br />But it flew away from her reach so<br />She ran away in her sleep<br />And dreamed of<br />Para-para-paradise, Para-para-paradise, Para-para-paradise<br />Every time she closed her eyes<br /><br />When she was just a girl<br />She expected the world<br />But it flew away from her reach<br />And the bullets catch in her teeth<br />Life goes on, it gets so heavy<br />The wheel breaks the butterfly<br />Every tear a waterfall<br />In the night the stormy night she'll close her eyes<br />In the night the stormy night away she'd fly<br /><span class="b-lyrics-from-signature"></span><br /><br />And dreams of<br />Para-para-paradise<br />Para-para-paradise<br />Para-para-paradise<br /><br /><br />It's good to get away for a bit. But it's even better to make the choices that are needed in your life to be happy on a consistent basis.<br /><br />I need to make changes. I need to shed a lot of fears and press forwards with life.<br /><br />Now is as good of a time as any.<br /><br />M.Merilovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06407393547792365687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8688139160689551780.post-75968952622168472612011-10-18T10:41:00.004-06:002011-10-18T11:16:10.714-06:00Come and Go<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://distillery.s3.amazonaws.com/media/2011/10/12/97dd61e570c94ef8a2112fc1c2d996ef_7.jpg"><img style="float: right; margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 400px;" src="http://distillery.s3.amazonaws.com/media/2011/10/12/97dd61e570c94ef8a2112fc1c2d996ef_7.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a><br />Stand-by for the kaleidascope skies.<br />Reflecting in her radical eyes.<br />Boy tries what the girl denies,<br />After a rainstorm,<br />A rainbows the prize.<br /><br />The appeture in my lense is focusing. My depth of field is shifting. The view I once had has now blurred and another, different, daunting and refreshing outlook is appearing before me. Currently, I am too overwhelmed to put enjoyment into this change. All I seem to be looking for is comfort. And yet, I still strive to find the focal points in this new landscape. I push further for more and more change while being held down by the coat tails by the weight of stability.<br /><br />Is it better to flourish and stumble forwards in expansion and quest for bigger, wider, deeper knowledge? Or is it better to dampen the expansion only slightly, maybe just in a different way, to stablize and root oneself? I know my life will affect and impact the world around me no matter what I choose. I know my life will leave a story. As to what story, I am befuddled. Legitimately feeling<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://distillery.s3.amazonaws.com/media/2011/10/13/95c37f23a4cd46c1b8c1beb5d30d4094_7.jpg"><img style="float: left; margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 400px;" src="http://distillery.s3.amazonaws.com/media/2011/10/13/95c37f23a4cd46c1b8c1beb5d30d4094_7.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a> torn is the worst and best feeling. I know the choice I make will be the "better" one no matter what. But to actually make a choice is daunting.<br /><br />If you haven't already guessed, or have even spent all of 5 minutes with me, you'll know I don't decide well. I love being the leaf on the water, going whichever way the wind takes and allowing for others to decide my circumstances. It get's me into trouble occasionally. It tends to take away from my life force from time to time. There is a delicate balance between standing within yourself and allowing life to happen. I stand, teetering, wavering in the breeze, in that balance quite often. It's an odd place to hold your life, I know.<br /><br />I have been catching my thoughts lately. The ones that have been standing out are the ones where I am dreaming of packing up everything I own, tying off loose ends and hitchhiking to California. Or driving up north and living in a cabin for the winter in solace.<br /><br />Looping back to my first subject; Fantasy or reality? Stability or freedom? As much as I would genuinely like to send that question out for other people to answer, I know the answer needs to come from me. I need to look to myself, and ask honestly.<br /><br />Much work to be done..<br /><br />M.<br /><br /><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=le34ygtODfI">"And your voice still echos in the hallways of this house"</a>Merilovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06407393547792365687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8688139160689551780.post-24042416956997011292011-10-12T10:05:00.003-06:002011-10-12T11:16:35.487-06:00Be the Bird, Be the KeyInspiration. Product to come. <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tnDXf6VPEFE">For now:</a><br /><br /><br />Little bird have you got a key?<br />Unlock the lock inside of me<br />Where will you go?<br />Keep yourself afloat<br />Feeling old until the wings unfolded<br />Caught me a long wind<br />Where will we go?<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://images.instagram.com/media/2011/10/12/ea19e7fcd0ee419589a08cad9ee28fb6_7.jpg"><img style="float: right; margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 400px;" src="http://images.instagram.com/media/2011/10/12/ea19e7fcd0ee419589a08cad9ee28fb6_7.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a><br />Keep ourselves afloat <p>I caught a long wind<br />A long life wind<br />I got to know the sky<br />But it didn’t know me<br />Got to see the light<br />And land on top of the sea<br />And be the bird, be the key<br />And now the current tells<br />What the wave withheld<br />And then the lightning say<br />Oh where light will lay<br />Where will you go?<br />Keep yourself afloat</p> <p>I caught a long wind<br />A long life wind<br />Like a swallow<br />A night owl<br />A little chickadee<br />Sad sparrow<br />Good morning bird<br />Good nightingale<br />I took a deep breath<br />And caught a long wind<br /><br />Her cutting clear blue eyes peered out her bedroom window, fingers tight, gripping the sill, toes just touching the vibrant pink shag carpet waiting beneath to catch the souls of her little feet. The screen pressed against her cheek as she craned her head to the left. A slight breeze energizes her blonde hair around her shoulders and face and forces a scrunching of her nose to happen so as not to use the hands so willfully keeping her hung from this white wooden frame to the outside world.<br />Only mere metal and glass keep her from the height of a great cherry tree in front of her. The chickadees dance around the soft pink blossoms that return the bird movement in their own subtle dance from the moist air gliding by. They give off a fragrance that sticks to the insid<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://images.instagram.com/media/2011/10/12/0439bedde130464fb25c2682d30daf27_7.jpg"><img style="float: right; margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 400px;" src="http://images.instagram.com/media/2011/10/12/0439bedde130464fb25c2682d30daf27_7.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a>e of the top of her nose. It's high tones open her airways but still are solid in their depth and bring this little scoundrel to a place of calm. She allows her eyes to take in all the sights in front of her now. The birds have become boring and the land below looks as if colour is oozing up from the center of the earth. The tones are strong and vibrant. The dew soaked ground is aching for sun from the afternoon rays. Those naive blue eyes graze over the yard that she knows as her kingdom. All the paths she has laid out, the half finished house she built and holds resentment for, the forest area she calls home, and this cherry tree brimming with what look like overweight black and white mice with wings and beaks. They flutter in front of her, flaunting their freedom in the brilliant and gentle colour of the flowers that bring her peace in her childlike thoughts of wondering.<br />Little did she know the crisp blue of her iris would slowly fold, in time, into a ring of dark grey, stark in its contrast, to a deep but soft blue that gives way to flecks of prairie gold and earth green.<br /><br />I caught a long wind<br />A long life wind<br />Like a swallow<br />A night owl<br />A little chickadee<br />Sad sparrow<br />Good morning bird<br />Good nightingale<br />I took a deep breath<br /><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gDEDkdwfWMo">And caught a long wind</a><br /><br /><br />M.<br /></p>Merilovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06407393547792365687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8688139160689551780.post-36435757017651376482011-10-09T11:35:00.004-06:002011-10-09T12:33:54.341-06:00Listing the Wonderful<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://distillery.s3.amazonaws.com/media/2011/10/06/1bbb03fa436c4a2a839bb6bd99bc0469_7.jpg"><img style="float: right; margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 400px;" src="http://distillery.s3.amazonaws.com/media/2011/10/06/1bbb03fa436c4a2a839bb6bd99bc0469_7.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a><br /><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=95DuaNFVpD0&feature=fvst">Fall is here</a>.<br /><br />(Now complete with a full playlist of fall listening to guide you through these words from my brain. Click away.)<br /><br />Change is inevitable. As much as I enjoyed this summer, I am starting to look forward to the <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Openmrpue64&feature=fvst">slowing of gears</a> that winter brings. I plan on doing a lot of renovating in this head of mine this year. Makes me quite excited to see where I'll be and more so, who I will be once the leaves bud and flowers grow.<br /><br />Even though I know you should be thankful all the time, I can see why the Thanksgiving holiday is put just before Mother Nature becomes a <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w_aCvGUI-Hc&feature=relmfu">ruthless bitch</a>. Well, at least she is here in the Frigid North.<br /><br />But I digress.<br /><br />It can be hard to see the good that is in front of us sometimes. We have our noses so close to the book, eyes peeled on the magnifying glass to the point of only focusing on the ink of the letters that make up the big picture. With going along that theme, I shall list things of slight and things of importance to me that I am humbled by their greatness.<br />(Not in any particular order)<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://images.instagram.com/media/2011/10/06/30feebeea83a4c618e11cebc324ba28a_7.jpg"><img style="float: left; margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 400px;" src="http://images.instagram.com/media/2011/10/06/30feebeea83a4c618e11cebc324ba28a_7.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a><br />A support group of fantastic humans who have flaws and grime that aren't <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wF7sAjVcFJM">perfect</a>. They mess up, they do dumb things, they fall down repeatedly. But even when they are down and full of the scum that life spits in your face, they manage to not only pull through eventually but support and love me and all the other people in their lives. I have an impeccable safety net of people who mean the world to me and I know will stay in my life path for a long, long time.<br /><br /><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PwUctgGIZJQ">Music</a>. Buying some speakers was one of the best purchases I've ever made. I can't live without the beautiful sound of distorted pitch through airwaves that reach my brain and register as bliss. I hold on to the happiness that sound gives me with all of my soul. My thankfulness towards music is never ending and overflowing.<br /><br /><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WUCPuD_RAZM">Expression</a>. Specifically through painting and photography. Documentation could be categorized in here as well. My many means of expression are a huge part of what keeps me sane and still slightly crazy. It is the bane of my existence and yet the joy of my life. Blogging, journaling, photography, painting, fashion, exploration of self in general. To be human is to be pulled in many directions and find balance between them all. I will never achieve true balance<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://distillery.s3.amazonaws.com/media/2011/10/06/0a7c9b7282464f0d93589ecede8267f3_7.jpg"><img style="float: right; margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 400px;" src="http://distillery.s3.amazonaws.com/media/2011/10/06/0a7c9b7282464f0d93589ecede8267f3_7.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a> but I'm content with that. I love the journey too much to stop.<br /><br />Yoga. Obviously. I have a new relationship with my physicality because of it and I wouldn't change it for the world. It has helped me find things about myself that I enjoy and <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K3P2o5gryfs">take pride in</a>. It brings me peace and silence in the midst of my chaotic mind. There is no other career path I'd rather take. I am proud to be a student of yoga and thus, a student of life.<br /><br />I hope that this might <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UBsJ09RhqZw">inspire</a>. To sit down and write out things that are solid forms of happiness in life is so important. Who knows, maybe doing the same next year will allow you to see how much you have grown.<br /><br />Holiday homework: Sit still. Breathe deeply. Document the quality of life. Give thanks.<br /><br />M.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://distillery.s3.amazonaws.com/media/2011/10/06/ebd3fa9155c84b0a88909af775a1f65a_7.jpg"><img style="display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 341px; height: 341px;" src="http://distillery.s3.amazonaws.com/media/2011/10/06/ebd3fa9155c84b0a88909af775a1f65a_7.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a>Merilovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06407393547792365687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8688139160689551780.post-27521263263030302842011-10-03T11:10:00.003-06:002011-10-03T11:21:39.116-06:00A Man of Wise Words<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://images.instagram.com/media/2011/10/03/1f52631bcbbe445aa77ea073577520dc_7.jpg"><img style="float: right; margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; cursor: pointer; width: 407px; height: 407px;" src="http://images.instagram.com/media/2011/10/03/1f52631bcbbe445aa77ea073577520dc_7.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a><br />“Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around. You tell them things that you’ve never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more. You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at you. When something wonderful happens, you can’t wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share in your excitement. They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself. Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful. There is never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a quiet calmness when they are around. You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you because they love you for who you are. The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in your heart to cherish forever. Memories of your childhood come back and are so clear and vivid it’s like being young again. Colours seem brighter and more brilliant. Laughter seems part of daily life where before it was infrequent or didn’t exist at all. A phone call or two during the day helps to get you through a long day’s work and always brings a smile to your face. In their presence, there’s no need for continuous conversation, but you find you’re quite content in just having them nearby. Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you. You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. Simple things bring them to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon. You open your heart knowing that there’s a chance it may be broken one day and in opening your heart, you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible. You find that being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure that’s so real it scares you. You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and possibly a soul mate who will remain loyal to the end. Life seems completely different, exciting and worthwhile. Your only hope and security is in knowing that they are a part of your life.” <br />― Bob Marley<br /><br />Wisdom verses safety. Protection and comfort, or vulnerability and depth?<br />To not choose is to choose.Merilovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06407393547792365687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8688139160689551780.post-82361668865683377192011-09-29T14:12:00.005-06:002011-09-29T15:12:35.073-06:00Before the FrostIt's funny how doing something as simple as moving your room around can change your entire life.<br /><br />But before delving into such endeavors, indulge in heavy quality melodies.<br /><br /><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YQ1LI-NTa2s&ob=av2e"><3 Happiness</a><br /><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bq7dJ7Og_jE&noredirect=1"><br /><3 A black speckled sky</a><br /><br /><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=orhDXFqmxjg&ob=av2e&noredirect=1"><3 A slow motion outdoors amphitheater concert dance party in the rain</a><br /><br />If you haven't guessed, I moved my room around, cleaned it, organized it, put everything where everything needed putting. The Roommate and I are dealing with a bit of an<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://distillery.s3.amazonaws.com/media/2011/09/23/b26bd347e5774326891e32fe150382c1_7.jpg"><img style="float: right; margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 400px;" src="http://distillery.s3.amazonaws.com/media/2011/09/23/b26bd347e5774326891e32fe150382c1_7.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a> electrical crisis at the moment so I had to make sure I moved everything around all the cords that I have everywhere due to my outlets not having power. It's a bit tedious. Or was at least! I concurred it all by myself. Which included moving a big corner unit desk, my bed, putting a shelf on top of a set of drawers that are at least 4.5 feet long. I'm obviously quite proud of myself but I feel like it was a very independent act.<br /><br />And NOW, well now my head is clear and my thoughts are fine tuned, focused and observant. My head is in the right place for once. Re-arraigning my room was probably the best thing I could have done for my mode of thinking. And doesn't life essentially come down to the personal thought? We are all thinking purely about ourselves all the time which, somehow, we are capable of making a conscious thought rather than empty numbing thoughts. If everyone found something comparable to moving their room around that would clear their mind so efficiently, we would have a really genuine world despite the levels of compacted negativity. Personally and generally.<br /><br />This is also coupled with the fact that I did another bikram class last night. And again tonight, and Saturday.. so I bought a week pass. Not sure how <a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://distillery.s3.amazonaws.com/media/2011/09/23/ad81d62d762a490e965dd755d83c0fde_7.jpg"><img style="float: left; margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 400px;" src="http://distillery.s3.amazonaws.com/media/2011/09/23/ad81d62d762a490e965dd755d83c0fde_7.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a>I'm going to be able to keep myself so healthy due to it having so much consequence otherwise. I'm really not a fan of passing out and throwing up in a class so I'm hydrating like mad and eating super duper healthy. I think I did pretty well last night. I was also pressured into going front and center by My Man so I felt a bit of pressure to do kinda well. Didn't help my competitive side to have a role call type thing for the new people to bikram so the thought of "They'll all think I've never done yoga before... heh heh heh." was lingering through my head once or twice.<br /><br />I wonder what my thought process will be with all this fall detoxing going on. I'm hoping for a theme of positivity and awareness? Haha if all goes well... Good luck to everyone around me for the next week, you're the one that's going to need it if I get sore enough.<br /><br /><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TGbVaJ5kl7s&noredirect=1">Sunshine and rainbows</a>,<br /><br />M.Merilovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06407393547792365687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8688139160689551780.post-44536231893103062762011-09-25T23:45:00.001-06:002011-09-26T13:58:36.871-06:00Simple Chaos<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://distillery.s3.amazonaws.com/media/2011/09/19/5bff169f72ed4a338b1204f16a3c90fe_7.jpg"><img style="float: right; margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 400px;" src="http://distillery.s3.amazonaws.com/media/2011/09/19/5bff169f72ed4a338b1204f16a3c90fe_7.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a><br />A certain bear once sang of the simplicities of life. A certain boy, dancing behind that bear where ever he went, believed him, wholeheartedly.<br />Now, ask any artist, any<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WzORRh6lzg4"> musician</a>, any person with passion and venom, what they give in their efforts. What do they show for themselves. Complexity. Dynamic. Diversity.<br /><br />What I want to express today is the brilliance and the depth of the gradient in between the two.<br /><br />Starting with the <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jqgDDxTr7ME">muddled</a>. Life gets so out of control, so wild and impulsive, so structured and tight. It whirls around you in circles, be them rigidly in perfectly accurate lines or splaying in every direction with chaotic momentum and zest. There is confusion and perception always in the way of clear thought. Mountains upon mountains of layered compacted habitual behavior that sometimes never get touched, never mind dealt with. Our minds work endlessly hard to build these walls to protect and stave off the negative. But what we sometimes don't realize is that these walls are just good at keeping the hurt out as they are at keeping it tucked in.<br /><br />On the other side of the map there is simplicity. Some people have too much of it. They can't grasp the concept of diversity and depth. They allow certain things to be the only thing they see and close down to any other method of behavior or thought process. Some people reject it and push it down in favor of drama and chaos. Some people take advantage of the simplicity that external objects grant them. Be it food, coffee, alcohol, heroin, or a sharp blade. Everything has the potential for abuse and overuse in the path to simple thought. People have these over active, undirected minds that stray off to unhealthy things just to experience it and have it encapsulate them.<br /><br />There is a third option.<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://images.instagram.com/media/2011/09/25/08613ab21fd54847932388a2a94c265c_7.jpg"><img style="float: left; margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 400px;" src="http://images.instagram.com/media/2011/09/25/08613ab21fd54847932388a2a94c265c_7.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a><br />I believe that our divinity, our wisdom and ability comes from being able to step back and take everything in while having the capability to narrow our focus to the smallest part of ourselves and bring a thorough self awareness to our lives. That gradient between the big picture and the smallest click is our gift. Our ability to see the beauty and <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4BuY-E_Ogk4&ob=av2n">vibrancy</a> in life is what makes us human. We have access to death and chaos while still being fully able to provide health and love.<br /><br />How I see it (my own personal opinion.. not that any of these words aren't just my perception), the first step is breath. I know I'm a yoga teacher and it's the obvious choice but there are very few people that I know that appreciate the importance of air entering your lungs. It gives us the control over our bodies and minds that we need to be able to do the work of stepping back and easing forwards. It gives us the motivation and easement to be able to balance the ebb and flow of life. To be able to breathe fully and sit in stillness is the best anchor and growth someone can do for themselves. To be able to see that we live and die alone and if we know ourselves to the greatest capability, we can love and share with others so much more fruitfully.<br /><br />Moral of the story. Appreciate life and everything it holds for you. Allow yourself to love and be loved. Give the world your best even if it's not returned to you immediate<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://images.instagram.com/media/2011/09/24/3d57a2f4e7f24c57ac3f3d65a7dbdfc4_7.jpg"><img style="float: right; margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 400px;" src="http://images.instagram.com/media/2011/09/24/3d57a2f4e7f24c57ac3f3d65a7dbdfc4_7.jpg" alt="" border="0" /></a>ly and appreciate the little bursts of sparkly brilliance that come your way. Notice them. Accept them. Open yourself to the possibility of life being a wonderful journey that we can only do our utmost with. Paddling against the river does nothing but tire out your weary arms and mind. Don't bother wasting your time and energy on past bullshit that serves you no purpose. Learn from your lessons, take in the wisdom and maturity time has to offer and stride onwards towards acceptance, happiness, love and gratitude. Be <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vRgrMby-XUE">playful</a>.<br /><br />Why not?<br /><br />M.Merilovehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06407393547792365687noreply@blogger.com0